Stephen Colbert Roasts Rumored Noem Romance with NSFW Advice as Late Show Returns
Stephen Colbert used his return to the Late Show on Monday night (Feb. 16, 2026 ET) to skeweringly address swirling rumors about an alleged relationship between two high-ranking officials. The host leaned into the scandal with a string of barbed jokes — including a particularly explicit bit of advice — as his program resumed fresh episodes this week.
Monologue mines scandal for risqué punchlines
Colbert opened his monologue by referencing a recent report that detailed private travel and unusual personnel moves surrounding the pair. The account described joint trips aboard a private-configured 737 MAX and recounted an incident in which a blanket was left behind on a plane; the pilot was briefly fired and then rehired when no alternative pilot was available.
Turning that material into late-night fodder, Colbert did not hold back. He mocked the plane itself — quipping about the manufacturer with a cartoonish delivery — and zeroed in on other allegations from the coverage, including claimed offers to buy revealing clothing for one of the officials. Colbert repeatedly underlined the personal stakes, noting that both people involved are married and have children, which amplified the comic and moral edge of his barbs.
Then came the most eyebrow-raising line. In a joke tied to a bizarre past admission by one of the officials about a violent incident with a pet, Colbert offered the alleged lover this blunt tip: avoid doggie style, especially near the gravel pit. The quip elicited the room’s nervous laughter and stinging applause, the kind of moment that has long defined the host’s willingness to blend politics, personality and shock humor.
Rumors persist; denials and presidential reaction
The allegations at the center of Colbert’s material have prompted repeated denials from the officials named in the coverage. Despite descriptions of their relationship as an open secret within certain circles, both have pushed back forcefully against the speculation.
President Donald Trump was also asked about the matter aboard Air Force One on Monday night, shortly before the Late Show aired. He told reporters, "I don't know about that. I mean, I haven't heard that. I'll find out about it, but I have not heard about it. " The president’s response did little to dampen the public appetite for the story, and it gave Colbert fresh material to lampoon during his return to the Ed Sullivan Theater.
Late Show returns to new-episode schedule amid network shake-up
The host’s biting monologue arrived as the Late Show resumed new episodes after a brief hiatus. Colbert’s week of programming includes a lineup of high-profile guests, and his return comes at a time of broader upheaval in late-night television. The program is set to continue new episodes through the coming months even as the long-running show’s future has been the subject of recent discussion.
For now, Colbert’s strategy remains familiar: take the headlines, sharpen the jokes and use the late-night stage to both entertain and amplify the gossip cycle. Monday’s segment showed how deftly he can turn a cable-news scandal into a series of brutal one-liners, while also signaling that his clean slate of new shows will keep him in the daily conversation through midseason.
Whether viewers saw the jokes as ruthless political satire or simply late-night salaciousness, Colbert made clear he will not shy away from the juiciest details — or the raunchiest punchlines — as long as the story stays in the headlines.
